I live beside the Mediterranean Sea.  The view is breath-taking. It literally inspires me. The sounds of the sea birds, and the water lapping on the beach refresh me.

Last night, I assisted again on the Marriage Course, which could equally well be called the Couples Course – and there is something in it also for singles.  One of the points made yesterday in the session: Building Strong Foundations was the difference between the excitement of dating and the humdrum of marriage.

Marriage is the relationship in which you can most easily discover the strengths and weaknesses that make up your personality, and who you truly are, deep down beyond the personality.  You have a voice, and your voice counts.  How you use your voice can create an abiding love that flourishes, or something much less enjoyable and enduring.  You count.

Many years ago, I had the feeling that I did not belong in this world.  As the saying goes, I felt like a stranger in a strange land.  Waking up this morning, the thought travelled through my mind again.  How would I address it?  Simply.

A couple of days ago, a friend sent me this video:

The Art of Blessing

It reminded me first of all, to be grateful.  Why?  Because I am blessed in many ways – with good friends who care about me; with a loving family; with a beautiful home; with a spiritual path that nourishes and enriches me;  with teachers and students who help me to awaken to more of the goodness in me and in my world.

Secondly, I recognized again how I can be a blessing.  An attitude of gratitude lifts me to a greater awareness of the blessings that are available to be shared with us all.  I can extend a prayer for happiness to those who are sad or in distress.  I can speak a kind word to someone who feels isolated and lonely,  I can touch a hand that is cold and withdrawn and give it my love; I can send a donation to alleviate suffering to those in crisis; I can embrace a friend with a warm hug.

So in a marriage, you may look for the faults in your loved one and complain when your needs are not being met. Or you can celebrate their beauty and uniqueness and look at how you may be able to give to them what they need on their life’s journey.  You can be a blessing.  You can be grateful. It is a choice.  You count.

Whether or not I feel I belong, I can create heaven or hell through my experience of living in this world.  My choice.  I count.

And the Sea?  Constantly changing, and humbling.  I may be a drop in the ocean, but where I am, I still count.

Tags: blessings, Gratitude, marriage

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